you may have noticed that there are several posts of poems and other creative pieces with dates that predate today, which is when i started this blog.
that is because, little by little, i am moving over some of my favorite works from my old blog and i wanted to stay true to the dates that they were written. newcomers - please check out the work and let me know what you think!
Monday, August 3, 2009
riding dolo
i want support in the same way that i dish it and
want to feel like when we kick it we can just kick it without any bullshit because
i love you and don't love it and for some reason my silence is not as legit as yours
it gives you
pause for frustration that isn't intentional yet
when i express the same sentiment your response is detrimental
to our
health
there is so much wealth in happiness and i want us to roll around filthy in it
spend time together loving and laughing and
just being us
the way we were and the way i know we still are but there are so many superfluous things standing in between the us and the view of that
but i'm resilient
despite my cries and sometimes whines
i'm stronger than people like to admit
and when i told you that i am committed
i am
so until things subside and this constructed divide crumbles
i'll just continue to tell you i love you
to show you i love you
to care for you and look out for you the way loved ones do
and soon you, too, will realize
that what's good for you is good for me too
that i have bad moments and days like you do
and that the playing field is equal betwixt and between moods
i just ask for more understanding because
i'm not as brush-off-your-shoulders and hardened as you
and every day i put more effort into walking tall beside you
i try so hard to provide for you and for us and to muster together the energy to always be what you want and need for me to be
but i need encouragement from you, too
and i want to feel like you care as much as i do about understanding and supporting me because
i'm human, too
so human
and i don't want to shirk away
i don't want to stay away
i want to create a way for us to have the life we deserve
until your luck turns to meet me halfway
and then we can
together
as partners
conquer everything that seeks to conquer us first.
want to feel like when we kick it we can just kick it without any bullshit because
i love you and don't love it and for some reason my silence is not as legit as yours
it gives you
pause for frustration that isn't intentional yet
when i express the same sentiment your response is detrimental
to our
health
there is so much wealth in happiness and i want us to roll around filthy in it
spend time together loving and laughing and
just being us
the way we were and the way i know we still are but there are so many superfluous things standing in between the us and the view of that
but i'm resilient
despite my cries and sometimes whines
i'm stronger than people like to admit
and when i told you that i am committed
i am
so until things subside and this constructed divide crumbles
i'll just continue to tell you i love you
to show you i love you
to care for you and look out for you the way loved ones do
and soon you, too, will realize
that what's good for you is good for me too
that i have bad moments and days like you do
and that the playing field is equal betwixt and between moods
i just ask for more understanding because
i'm not as brush-off-your-shoulders and hardened as you
and every day i put more effort into walking tall beside you
i try so hard to provide for you and for us and to muster together the energy to always be what you want and need for me to be
but i need encouragement from you, too
and i want to feel like you care as much as i do about understanding and supporting me because
i'm human, too
so human
and i don't want to shirk away
i don't want to stay away
i want to create a way for us to have the life we deserve
until your luck turns to meet me halfway
and then we can
together
as partners
conquer everything that seeks to conquer us first.
Making the big move!
After years of having a blog located at http://www.xanga.com/skytrox , I have decided that, with a new year in the bag (my birthday is fast approaching on the 13th), it's time for a new web address!
Stay tuned as I begin to move some of my poetry and spoken word pieces over to this new location.
Stay tuned as I begin to move some of my poetry and spoken word pieces over to this new location.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
covergirl concealer
my world is so muttered with misconception
mangled with the idea that things can stay the same without other things moving forward and that
the things that should be moving forward can either stay stagnant or moonwalk back when
in fact
that is the biggest misconception of them all
you see
love tends to defy all categories
mystify the logical senses in a way that creates a safety bubble around preexisting and current trangressions but when
even that love is pushed to its limits it begins to shift into panic room mode and look within
or with out with a pen
to examine what ought to be happening
to love hard is without control
but the manner in which that love is disseminated certainly has its limits
it can't see-saw to one side and survive
it needs to toggle back and forth otherwise the game is not worth playing at all
and what's more is
those cards that you've tried so hard to stack into a house will fall
and the mess is hard to rebuild
as you know
outpouring of helping hands and hearts still have not rebuilt the ruins of katrina
and they had outside help
this is a private affair
for private eyes and private ears but
will get nowhere if the message isn't clear on both ends even
seething and walking away helps nothing
pervasive frustrations mold and spread
damp with stubborn stares and the revamping of bad past habits
stemming from the need to be harshly defensive to survive
i am not her or him or them and i do not operate well under stares and shut-downs
solitary moments of silence that only seek to deliver uncertainty in a time where that is the ultimate last ingredient that should be added to the recipe
it doesn't need to be stringent but it should be based in compromise
the basis of our lives likely depends on it
feeling eyes that look without faith or hope or help or care
that i know used to be there but seems to be waning with the moonlight
i crave their return but fear i am in an important conversation to save something
by myself.
mangled with the idea that things can stay the same without other things moving forward and that
the things that should be moving forward can either stay stagnant or moonwalk back when
in fact
that is the biggest misconception of them all
you see
love tends to defy all categories
mystify the logical senses in a way that creates a safety bubble around preexisting and current trangressions but when
even that love is pushed to its limits it begins to shift into panic room mode and look within
or with out with a pen
to examine what ought to be happening
to love hard is without control
but the manner in which that love is disseminated certainly has its limits
it can't see-saw to one side and survive
it needs to toggle back and forth otherwise the game is not worth playing at all
and what's more is
those cards that you've tried so hard to stack into a house will fall
and the mess is hard to rebuild
as you know
outpouring of helping hands and hearts still have not rebuilt the ruins of katrina
and they had outside help
this is a private affair
for private eyes and private ears but
will get nowhere if the message isn't clear on both ends even
seething and walking away helps nothing
pervasive frustrations mold and spread
damp with stubborn stares and the revamping of bad past habits
stemming from the need to be harshly defensive to survive
i am not her or him or them and i do not operate well under stares and shut-downs
solitary moments of silence that only seek to deliver uncertainty in a time where that is the ultimate last ingredient that should be added to the recipe
it doesn't need to be stringent but it should be based in compromise
the basis of our lives likely depends on it
feeling eyes that look without faith or hope or help or care
that i know used to be there but seems to be waning with the moonlight
i crave their return but fear i am in an important conversation to save something
by myself.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
farewell, five letters
i say it when i know i should because i never want to feel like i didn't and missed the time to reconcile the moment
won't it
make things a little easier once the air is cleared
to say the letters five
loud and clear
especially when it's not fair to expect the same and remain silent?
i can do and do and do and then
somewhere amidst the do's
commit one don't
and the walls fall
all stands still until i utter those words into the air and then
even then
sometimes it still doesn't make ends meet again.
my heart's beats cease when all that i feel and am and do gets defeated by some meaningless assumption deep-seated in your brain
in vain
i often remain silent because to 'defend' myself is worthless in the eyes of the defeated
sometimes i love so hard it hurts
and i give until i bleed
and all i really want in return is to feel like
at the end of the day
i've satisfied the person that means the world to me
i say five letters because i mean them
because i never want to live my last breath feeling like someone didn't know i was bigger
and better than to be five letters less
less the pride and the gumption to refuse to
i say the five letters because sometimes
it's worth the word over anguish
the word of worry
the word over...
over the end.
i'm sorry
are you?
won't it
make things a little easier once the air is cleared
to say the letters five
loud and clear
especially when it's not fair to expect the same and remain silent?
i can do and do and do and then
somewhere amidst the do's
commit one don't
and the walls fall
all stands still until i utter those words into the air and then
even then
sometimes it still doesn't make ends meet again.
my heart's beats cease when all that i feel and am and do gets defeated by some meaningless assumption deep-seated in your brain
in vain
i often remain silent because to 'defend' myself is worthless in the eyes of the defeated
sometimes i love so hard it hurts
and i give until i bleed
and all i really want in return is to feel like
at the end of the day
i've satisfied the person that means the world to me
i say five letters because i mean them
because i never want to live my last breath feeling like someone didn't know i was bigger
and better than to be five letters less
less the pride and the gumption to refuse to
i say the five letters because sometimes
it's worth the word over anguish
the word of worry
the word over...
over the end.
i'm sorry
are you?
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Spoken Lyrics for MJ
august 29th brought a remarkable talent to life
him and 8 siblings blessed the world and the world watched, waiting
stared on at the life and strife that would insue
and you
and i
bore witness to the 7th of the bunch breath magical air into dreams
Billie Jean was not his lover but
Michael Jackson was mine.
in fact i
Remember The Time i first cried watching him perform
glittered glove glory
penny loafer-clad feet gliding across stages like the biblical travel on water
he
too
helped people make sense of the senseless surrounding
all of this in his swift steps and grace
giving faith to fans who had no other way and could only watch a young man from Gary, Indiana travel the land in grand form
earned by hard work and dedication but, above all, humility and honor
braving childhood-less beginnings and inappropriate child accusations
only to still Heal The World by stopping with the Man In The Mirror.
his reflection made me believe that there were places larger than this
people more caring than these
and causes larger than our own daily drawl
in him
i saw a distant friend to all
the definition of talent
of entertainment
of music
of humanitarianism
of heart.
his bigger gift to the world is undoubtedly his legacy of hands-on concern for mankind
talking the talk
walking the walk
dancing the dream
a son, a brother, a friend, a musician, a humanitarian, a legend
I Wanna Be Where You Are but
because of you
I will continue on here some more to Make A Change For Once In My Life
Who Am I
To Be Blind
Pretending Not To See Them Weep?
Michael Jackson was and is the unforgettable Thriller.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
cookie crumbs
i feel so
misunderstood
in this
sea of perpetual misunderstanding
shifty eyes meet my perception every time i choose to look in an alternate direction even
for one minute
and then in two
we go from love to leery gestures
festering anger clearly there but
from where?
needing a sense of what's what and what's more is that the more i explore my own feelings and expand the way i relate
it seems that i'm met with more frustration and...
hate?
i hope not because my love runs thicker than the beauty of the london fog and one day i hope to travel overseas together and see the clouds
just her and i
and why things are difficult i cannot quite tell when, well, i am resigned to our personalities being different
and in many ways have come to embrace all of the different tidbits
in fact, i think i'm growing from them
and learning to meet them in the middle has made me a bigger person from them
i met her
and from then
i believe everything happened for a reason
but i cannot continue to feel like i am causing misery in a person who i value as much more than a friend
everything within her i need
i flourish on the things that challenge our existence
i just want to feel like i'm in this to win this with another winner
and not someone who is quick to judge and throw in the proverbial towel
my head and my heart cannot stand the thought of you being unfulfilled in my presence
because the essence of what i think we have and what i want us to be means something bigger and better
but i don't know if i'll ever know the real because the phony facade of happiness that reads complacency is far from transparent
i want you
and i need you
and i'm changing and growing
but today
and yesterday
i wonder if it's enough.
misunderstood
in this
sea of perpetual misunderstanding
shifty eyes meet my perception every time i choose to look in an alternate direction even
for one minute
and then in two
we go from love to leery gestures
festering anger clearly there but
from where?
needing a sense of what's what and what's more is that the more i explore my own feelings and expand the way i relate
it seems that i'm met with more frustration and...
hate?
i hope not because my love runs thicker than the beauty of the london fog and one day i hope to travel overseas together and see the clouds
just her and i
and why things are difficult i cannot quite tell when, well, i am resigned to our personalities being different
and in many ways have come to embrace all of the different tidbits
in fact, i think i'm growing from them
and learning to meet them in the middle has made me a bigger person from them
i met her
and from then
i believe everything happened for a reason
but i cannot continue to feel like i am causing misery in a person who i value as much more than a friend
everything within her i need
i flourish on the things that challenge our existence
i just want to feel like i'm in this to win this with another winner
and not someone who is quick to judge and throw in the proverbial towel
my head and my heart cannot stand the thought of you being unfulfilled in my presence
because the essence of what i think we have and what i want us to be means something bigger and better
but i don't know if i'll ever know the real because the phony facade of happiness that reads complacency is far from transparent
i want you
and i need you
and i'm changing and growing
but today
and yesterday
i wonder if it's enough.
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